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Joined 3 years ago
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Cake day: June 14th, 2023

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  • She has expressed guilt over feeling like she experimented with me, but she has also stated that she said she wouldn’t feel certain unless she gave us a chance.

    I mean, I’ll admit I’ve been out of the dating scene for a while. But there’s such a high bar between “giving this thing a shot” and “co-mingling our legal status and financial accounts permanently”.

    As for family, they’re maga, I have no ties with them.

    Well, that fucking sucks and I’m double sorry.

    I have a couple of close friends. She seemed to have been preparing me for this as recently she was attempting to push me to socialize more outside of her own friends and family more.

    That’s the healthiest way to engage with this kind of shit. Being alone at the end of a relationship is miserable. You have to get out and do shit and be near other people. Intoxicants don’t hurt, either.

    Like, the pain goes away with time. But up front, do what you gotta do to survive the trauma. Friends definitely help with that, even if its just to hold your hair back and hand you a wipey when you’ve bombed out at the end of a night.






  • I was her last chance in regards to men

    Might have been nice to mention this a year before the wedding rather than a year after.

    I’m not angry with her, and we’re not leaving each others lives, just changing roles. It still hurts a lot, but that’s life sometimes. It isn’t anyone’s fault.

    Idk. It’s nice to say this sort of thing generically. And if your friendship can survive the end of the relationship, that’s healthy and good. But you’ve got every right to feel angry over what was an insincere commitment not a year earlier.

    Don’t feel that her revealed sexuality voids your right to your own feelings. For friends and family, grin and bare it. But for an intimate partner, keeping this kind of thing so late into the relationship is a kind of infidelity. The last thing you should feel is shame over your anger or your grief.

    Good luck on the path forward. I hope you’ve got a circle of family and friends you can lean on along the way.




  • Gorsuch voted to overturn Roe which was a fairly epic disrespect for court precedent.

    Gorsuch had a long history on the bench as anti-choice. He overturned a 50 year old precedent, not one he’d just co-signed last year.

    But I no longer put anything past this SCOTUS.

    There’s more to the judiciary than just issuing rulings on a whim. They need the lower courts to line up behind them. And conflicting decisions at the highest level ultimately allow lower courts to rule at their own whim rather than according to a supreme precedent.

    Imagine the SCOTUS ruling against California and sending it back down to a liberal California appellate court, only for the lower court to disregard the SCOTUS California ruling by referencing the Texas SCOTUS ruling. Or for the lower court or the state to feign confusion and refuse to follow the SC decision. Or do what so many other states have done and hastily engineer a new map that’s just different enough to force a new case. Without some kind of bright line distinction between the two decisions, they could just do that and send it back up to SCOTUS in a case that wouldn’t resolve before the next election.

    As ACB said “we’re not just a bunch of hacks in here.”

    If you’ve got to say shit like that out loud…

    But she’s not wrong. These aren’t celebrity hacks who came in on the reality TV circuit, they’re legal street fighters who know how the system works in practice. If they do rule against California, it’ll be curious to see how they try to thread the needle. And how the California legislature - which still has plenty of time to submit revised (but still gerrymandered) maps - chooses to respond.