They’ll be pretending that they’re so interested in knowing you but once you tell them their mask falls off.

I hate that most guys are hypersexual, chill, be a normal person and not a wild animal for some time.

  • Zer0_F0x@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    37
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    1 month ago

    The vast majority of people aren’t asexual. Better to be honest and leave than be in a relationship you’re uncomfortable with

    • Katerina@lemmy.zipOP
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      15
      arrow-down
      6
      ·
      1 month ago

      I know, but don’t pretend to want to know me or be my friend when you’re actually not.

      • eskimofry@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        1 month ago

        unfortunately that’s how the “game” is setup so a lot of dudes think they’re just doing the right thing.

  • the_riviera_kid@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    19
    ·
    1 month ago

    If they are looking for a sexual relationship then they are doing you a favor by leaving you alone. Would you rather they stick around and try to pressure you into sex?

      • the_riviera_kid@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        14
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        1 month ago

        Yeah that one is a bit fucked.

        Not that it will make you feel any better but if they are leaving as soon as they know they can’t get in your pants then you know their intentions were never honorable any way. So by being shitty they are accidentally doing you a favor.

  • FrowingFostek@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    11
    ·
    1 month ago

    I imagine these are guys that you’ve encountered in the wild. It’d be really funny if you were on a dating app and simultaneously making this post.

      • TwigletSparkle@lemmy.blahaj.zone
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        26
        ·
        1 month ago

        Meeting with people irl and matching with someone on a dating app have different different expectaions, depending on where you’re meeting people irl.

        If I went on a dating app expecting a sexual relationship and the other person revealed they were asexual then obviously I’d look elsewhere. It’s not a read of you as a person, you just have different goals and that’s ok.

        • FrowingFostek@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          10
          ·
          1 month ago

          Yeah I agree with this.

          In my experience it’s hard to gauge sometimes, IRL, if someone wants a platonic/physical/romantic relationship.

          Where as on a dating app one would expect people to state their interests plainly.

      • CluckN@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        14
        ·
        1 month ago

        Apps are for dating/hookups. Don’t hate the players hate the game. If you’re ace you gotta make it obvious on your profile instead of dropping it mid conversation.

  • agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    10
    ·
    1 month ago

    As a guy, lots of guys get like, 2-5 close friends and they are content with that. They don’t have time to spend with more than that, why bother with more? Not everyone needs dozens of “friends”

    A girlfriend/sexual partner is different. You can make an exception for a sexual partner, they’re ideally going to be a friend as well, so you want to be friendly and make sure their interests are somewhat compatible. Generally speaking that bar is a fair bit lower for sexual partners.

    But once they tell you it’s not going to happen, they’re just another potential acquaintance you aren’t going to have time for. Being a “normal person” is keeping your friend circle tight and high-quality. Sounds like you were compatible enough to be a sexual partner, but not enough to be an actual close friend, so once partner was off the table that was that.

  • Cass@piefed.blahaj.zone
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    4
    ·
    1 month ago

    It bothers me that most of the replies are trying to argue with you. It sucks to not be able to just be friendly with guys. Even if it’s an ace-but-not-aro thing, it’s understandable but still frustrating.

  • Jakeroxs@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    3
    ·
    1 month ago

    As a dude, hyper sexual dudes suck and make us all look worse, I blame society somewhat for either literally promoting it or at the very least looking past it.