I never wanted to post something like this. In the year 2025, I’ve lost three family members, and I’m afraid of losing more because this year has been tragic losing them. This is the first time I’ve ever really grieved. When I was younger, I lost a lot of family to cancer and other diseases, but never really cared because I was too young to understand death.

This year, however, my grief has been horrible. It started in March, when my grandfather was in the hospital. On the day of his passing, I was at a waterpark with my best friend, celebrating my birthday a few days before. I had been excited to do this for weeks. Unfortunately, tragedy struck about an hour before. My dad called my mom, crying that my grandpa wasn’t doing well and to get my sister and I up there to visit before they pulled the plug. I was terrified, and torn about what to do. I suggested we visit my grandpa and go to the waterpark another day, but unfortunately, we had already booked tickets and had to go. Ultimately, we ended up having a great time, but my mom was crying in a corner most of the time (she was our driver). I found out later that my grandpa had passed while my friend and I were swimming. My birthday was terrible as my mom was being rude to me and we spent most of the day talking about my grandpa and planning his funeral.

Next was the death of my great aunt. Personally I wasn’t super close to her, as we only saw each other like once a year because she lived six hours away from me. I went to her funeral yesterday, it was ok. It wasn’t nearly as tragic as my grandfather’s.

Today my grandmother’s dog was put down. I don’t know how to feel right now. My mom and I are visiting later on our way home and I just don’t know what to do. At the same time I’m super nervous that more people in my family are going to die. I know it’s unlikely, but I’m just so nervous.